Parents are very powerful figures in the life of any child. First of all, they are responsible for conceiving the child and for bringing that child into this world so everything that comes after there will still be held somewhat responsible. The mother best of all has a special emotional connection with her children while fathers are mostly the ones who deal with practical things in raising children.

A perfect relationship between parents and children will be when the parents are role models of providing love and support within the family while the children are obedient but to a certain degree also independent in living their lives. In this world however there is no such thing as perfect but this should not stop us from trying to build an ideal relationship.

There can always be a health compromise but the most important thing that parents should remember is that the times when the children are still young is the only time they can make the biggest impact. The children are innately obedient and loving towards their parents so it is up to the parents to use this advantage in instilling good things to their children so they grow up to be good and strong willed individuals.

One thing that parents can help a child build is their children’s self esteem. Parents should also be aware that aside from being crucial to building a child’s self esteem, it is so easy to damage their self esteem if parents do not deal with their children properly. Parents can contribute in developing positive feelings of self worth in their children by helping them in a lot of aspects including the social and academic factors. Let us look some tips that will help the parents out there to build their children’s self esteem.

Constant and sincere appreciation will make your child feel special. Most parents tend to only communicate with their children if they need something from them or if they need to correct them in whatever they are doing. This is not a good practice. Parents should take the time to talk to their children about good things that they have done.

Make sure that whatever you say is sincere and appropriate. Do not over praise because as in anything else too much praising can bring out a negative result. When you really need to comment on something bad, do not be judgmental instead phrase your comment in a positive form.

Your children may not be mature but they know when they are simply being corrected without explanation. Offer a reason why they are being corrected or better yet work with your children to arrive at a solution to make things better so such a situation will not happen again.

If you have children with learning disability, make sure that you very well understand the nature of your children’s problem and vow to closely work with teachers and other important people to make her environment friendly to her despite her disability. All these things are not full proof shields against possible crushing of self esteem but it will help them deal with the harsh realities of like with a perspective that they are tough and can meet challenges head on. They may fail but they will get back on their feet faster than everyone else.

Adolescence is perhaps the most complicated in one’s life. Although adulthood can be pretty complicated too, nothing can match the adjustments that we have to make during this period of “growing up.”

In addition to the usual stress that physical changes and hormonal changes in the body give, adolescents also have to deal with changes in their social interaction with people. This is also the time or period in their lives when they will experience emotional changes. This is the time when most will first become aware of the opposite sex and maybe fall in love or have a puppy love.
In this period of great changes and upheavals, of scattered energies and differing emotions, a teenager’s self-esteem becomes vulnerable.

Although self-esteem is basically developed in childhood through parental love and attention; Only the foundation is built in this period. The essence of one’s self-esteem will be solidified during the adolescence period and of course all through adulthood.

This is the reason why it is important to develop a teener’s self-esteem further during this period. Unfortunately, social groups in high schools and other social dynamics often lower their self-esteem. Below are some tips to help your teeners build high self-esteem.

Give them role models

Parents are of course their children’s primary role models. This is acceptable when they are kids but let’s face the fact that we can’t really compete with younger role models that they are exposed to in the media. People like Lindsay Lohan and Hillary Duff seem more believable and more attractive to teenagers.

Although basically parents should still strive to become a good example to their children, they should also accept the fact that they cannot be their only role models for long. They need other role models who they can really identify with.

The role of parents now should be to help their teeners choose role models that are admirable. They should also be taught to differentiate the characteristics that they should emulate and traits that they should not. After all, role models are for guidance and not for copying.

Give them your trust

One of things that will help your child trust themselves and their abilities is for parents like you to trust them. If they feel that you do not respect them as individuals, they will not respect themselves enough to try to achieve things for themselves. If you do not trust them and if you do not have confidence in what they can do, how do you expect them to develop their talents and achieve greatness.

Trust is a complicated issue and most parents will become confused at how to achieve a balance. It is important that parents try though. Too many limitations and restrictions can curb their potentials but too lax may get them lost.

Give them their voice

The right to argue and to explain your side of the story has become only a privilege in most homes. This should not be. Parents also make mistakes. Before judging and imposing sanctions, it is important that you allow your kids to state their case and explain their actions. After which, judge accordingly.

Allowing them their own voice and their own opinions teaches them to think on their own and decide for themselves. Thus, they begin to trust their instincts and develop their self-esteem.

One of the main things that a person should have in order to become successful and to lead a long and happy life is to have a full trust in himself and his capabilities. Loving yourself enough to know your limitations and your strengths is one of the ingredients in leading a life of contentment.

There is really no sure answer as to how and where self-esteem springs from. Some psychologists say that it is the function of the personality that has been acquired from both parents. Parents who have high self-esteem will most likely produce children who are also confident.

Some sectors however say that genetics does not play a role. Rather, it is the function of chance. Some people are just born to have high self-esteem while others are born with low ranges much like what happens with intelligence quotients.

Some psychologists however argue that most of the development of the self-esteem happens in the environment. Personal experience, parental practices, choice of friends and discovery of talents play a major role in determining just how much self-esteem a person will develop.

Personal experiences come in the form of bullying in school and social group interactions. Children who have experience much bullying in school will develop low self-esteem. The same goes with children who remain on the outside of the social group.

Parental practice and the example that they give can also play a large role in determining the development of the self-esteem. A person for instance who has parents who trusts him to make his own decisions, is not over-protective and treats him like an adult will most likely have high self-esteem compared to children who have parents who coddle him, those who are strict and those who see him so helpless like a child, incapable of making his own decision. It is important then for parents to think about their parental behavior for they will greatly affect how their child will grow up.

The choice of friends and the social group that one belongs to can also cushion and develop the self-esteem. Becoming part of a group that embraces a person’s individual traits and respects their own opinions will help develop the self-esteem. This is rapid contrast to a social group that seeks to put down the person. Social groups can also cushion the person against the threats of outside forces that can destroy or lower the self-esteem.

Cliques can also play a role. Being part of the high school populars, for instance, can strengthens one’s ego compared to being part of the group that is ostracized.

Having a talent or an ability that can stand out from the crowd is also another thing that can boost a person’s self-esteem. If he can offer something that people will admire, his trust and confidence in himself will strengthen. Affirmations, accolades and admirations are great ego boosts to people. This is perhaps why people who have achievements because of their own talents have higher self-esteem than others.

Still, having high self-esteem in one aspect of one’s life does not mean that the high self-esteem will also apply in other sectors. For instance, a person can be ultra confident in one’s school work but become a bumbling idiot when it comes to social interactions and emotional entanglements. There are only a few people who can achieve the right balance of self-esteem in all aspects of life.

Self-esteem is a personality ingredient that one has to have and if possible in great amounts. That is not to say that a person need to be extremely sure of oneself to the point of arrogance; they just need enough amounts to be able to withstand the pressures of life and lead a contented existence.
It wouldn’t make much difference if self-esteem can be measured.

This is because there is really no specific amount of self-esteem that one can be prescribed with. Different persons need different amounts of self-esteem the same way that different dynamics or aspects of one person’s life require different doses of self-esteem. There is really no specific amount. In fact, different situations also demand different amounts of self-esteem.

Whatever the amounts that you need, there is no argument that one needs self-esteem. It is basically developed during the growing up years in the way we are treated by our parents and the people around us. Parental treatment and social group interaction play major roles in the development of self-esteem. But that is not to say that self-esteem will be a permanent fixture come adulthood. It can still be developed and enhanced, no matter what the age is.

Below are some tips in how to develop the self-esteem, techniques that can work across all ages. Read on and you might get a thing or two that you can apply in your own life or with other people.

Self-affirmation

There is a difference between self-love and narcissism. Although it is not recommended to become obsessed with one’s positive qualities, it is not wrong to once in a while acknowledge our achievements and talents. Self-affirmation is a great way to increase our self-esteem levels. Telling yourself that you are great in front of the mirror every morning may seem too much but it actually works in increasing one’s self-confidence.

Of course, you don’t have to take self-affirmation to the extreme if you don’t want to. Sometimes acknowledging the little achievements that you have done at the end of the day is enough to raise the rate of self-esteem.

Doing the things that you love

There is no aphrodisiac that would make you love yourself more than doing the things that you love. When you love what you are doing, you become happier and more enthusiastic. You will also become more interested in developing your skills, thereby improving yourself and allowing you to trust yourself more. Besides, if you are happy with what you are doing, you are more confident with your decisions and your actions.

Voicing out

There is something quite liberating with voicing out your own opinions and speaking your mind. Although there are some people who would try to put you down and argue with what you believe in; there are still people who will respect you for your thoughts. Acknowledging your thoughts and becoming comfortable with your thoughts will allow you to slowly trust yourself; thus increasing your self-esteem.

Accepting that you are not perfect

There is no perfect person in the world. Often, people develop low self esteem because they try so much to become perfect; but one thing that they have to learn is that they cannot become one because there is no perfect person. All they can be is the best that they can be.

One of the main issues that parents must deal with when raising a kid is their self-concept and self-esteem. Teaching our kids to value themselves and their talents can be a tricky thing to do as parents must be able to achieve a balance between allowing their kids enough independence to be able to decide for themselves and act on their own and the guidance that will keep them in the right path.

Being too lax and giving them too much freedom can lead to rebellion while being too strict can destroy a child’s independent spirit and foster too much dependence.

Although self-esteem can be developed anytime in a person’s life, it is good to start early and train your child to trust in what they can do and to embrace their individual talents. Below are some activities that you can do with your child that can help them increase their levels of self-esteem.

Self-affirming statements

Talking to yourself in front of the mirror and telling yourself what a great person you are can be a bit childish for a grown-up to do but not for a child. And even if it seems childish, the practice is quite effective in boosting our self-esteem. And you don’t even have to stick to the mirror process. You can create your own as long as you stick to the basic, which is the saying of self-affirming statements.

Create a mantra that your child can easily remember. Every morning, tell your child the mantra and have your child tell hers to you. The statements need not even be something about the self but about each other such as saying I love you in the morning or telling each other how great the other is.
There is really no exact way to do this. You can create your own variations as long as the essence of affirming oneself is there.

The positive trait game

Another activity that you can do with your child that will not only boost her self-esteem but also help in building his or her vocabulary is the positive trait game. In this game, you wll each tell each other the positive traits that one sees in the other. The catch is that the trait should start in a specific letter of the alphabet.

The positive trait game is a wonderful way to teach your kid to think positive thoughts and to acknowledge the traits and talents that make him or her unique. This is also a great way to make sure that he or she will grow up knowing where his or her strengths lie.

Do activities that they love

Encourage them to try out new things so that they will discover their talents and abilities. Enroll them in different summer classes and be open to all kinds of things. For instance, if he is good with drawing and crayons, it does not mean that he will not be good in music. So don’t discount music lessons as part of his summer curriculum.

Anyhow, if he does not like it, at least he has learned something new. Helping them discover the things that they love to do and the things that they are good at is a great way to boost their self esteem early on. After all, when children are enjoying what they are doing, they become very enthusiastic and they are open to developing their skills further.